Everyone has their own main concerns and deal breakers. Your spouse might actually be thinking that she wants to spare the kids the pain/job of cleaning out and dealing with the house if both of you become unable to.

It's really hard to plan every last thing financially. And of course I totally relate to wanting to stay in your own environment for as long as possible. I don't know that any of us, in this system, can plan to leave our kids anything financial, but in the meantime you can take steps to take care of business--there's nothing saying you can't "downsize" in your own house, cull possessions, and get everything as ready as possible for simple living as you face more physical challenges of aging, like compromised eyesight and ease of movement.

Either way I wish you the very best of luck.