I am so glad your parents and in-laws mostly got to die at home, it's just so much nicer, and how great of you to take in your mother. My sister offered to do that for my mother, but she was already at a stage of dementia where she wasn't understanding what the alternative was (memory care) and she was refusing to move anywhere.

But yeah. It's hugely expensive. And it would have to be--as we learned, 24/7 care of an elderly person with dementia brings a whole new meaning to the phrase "labor intensive."